Are You a Crazy Pushover Mom?

I have asked my own self this question many times throughout my 17 years of being a mom.  Am I a pushover?  I am a softie by nature and tend to soak up my 3 kid’s drama like a big yellow sponge.  I love having the awesome adventure of raising two teens and a toddler, but with that comes all kinds of craziness!

I often look around the house and wonder where I went wrong.  Why am I the only one who thinks dirty socks, empty chip bags, and toys are not part of the decor?  My endless attempts of creating chore charts, post-it note reminders, and old fashioned nagging don’t always do the trick.

It’s hard to say no to my handsome son when he asks for the zillionth time for extra cash for a fun night out with his friends.  Inside I’m thinking, why am I not out with my friends spending my money? Don’t get me wrong; both my teens have part time jobs, but it’s hard to get the message across that saving and budgeting your money helps start good patterns- they just want to have fun!

I’m still working on listening to their problems without jumping in too fast to fix things.  Hannah came home last week with a problem at school and before she even shared, she reminded me NOT to call her teacher… she was going to take care of things on her own.  At times, I have to bite my lip and repeat in my head the verse “Understand this, my dear brothers and sisters: You must all be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry (James 1:19).”  I want my children to grow up God confident that they can fix their own problems without a crazy MAMA TNT rescue mission.  My love for them is protective and fierce, but I’m reminded daily that God loves them even more than I do!

Teaching our kids personal responsibility is one of the best life lessons we can give them (and moms too).  I wasted years attempting to nag help my son get straight A’s- knowing he was fully capable of making high scores academically.  I was a former 5th grade teacher, for heaven’s sake – I had a college education dedicated with the knowledge and wisdom on how to bring out the best in students.  I will never forget the day, I exploded over a score he made in science class.  He forgot to turn in an assignment and it dropped his grade to a D.  I blasted him with words like- responsibility, dedication, discipline, organization, disappointment… I think you get the point.  But, the look on his face stopped me dead in my tracks.  He drove off to school and I knew he was crushed in spirit.  My craziness over his grades, made my son feel unloved.  I immediately called him on his cell and asked him to forgive me.  Everything in his voice crushed MY heart.  I had royally messed up and it was my responsibility to fix my problem.  I’m embarrassed to admit to you that this happened the day before my mission trip to Ethiopia in February.  God convicted my heart and I have been “grade crazy” free for the past three months ( you can ask my son).  I’m a constant work in progress, and grateful for God’s mercies!

Moms, we can always admit our mistakes, and come up with a new plan- it’s absolutely never too late to redeem ourselves, even when we have teenagers and toddlers!

Take the “Are you a Pushover” Quiz here.

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