Mom VS. Princess TNT
Zoie turns 29 months old today! She is almost officially a 2.5 year old. It’s hard to imagine how tiny she was when we first met her in Ethiopia. Her spirit radiates spunk and life and joy! We are so honored to be her family and fall in love with her more each day. She loves to sing, dance, swim, skip, color, take baths, and cuddle. She hates naps, vegetables, meat, the word no, and sticky hands. Hubby and I feel like we’re seasoned parents with 2 teenagers who managed to stay alive during the terrible terrific twos. At times, we rack our brain trying to remember the tips we received from family and friends as they helped us maneuver through the toddler years. A few blasts from the past surface, but nothing seems to compare with Princess TNT!!
Princess TNT (aka Zoie) can throw a temper tantrum like a keg of dynomite with a pink bow. It can be startling, when the fuse blows and we missed the vital warning signs. The other day, daddy told her she needed to eat her grapes before she could have her crackers. The shrilling screams made him duck for cover, but I dragged him out and convinced him he was safe. The thing that works well with Zoie right now are “Time In’s.” We learned this technique in one of my adoption books, but it really works. When the explosion of emotion is at a max, we put her on her chair and stand quietly next to her. I put my hand on her head or back and just remind her how much I love her even when she is throwing a fit. I time her 2.5 minutes and then say outloud- “OK, time-in is over. If she has quieted down and things are back in control… I let her get up and back to playing.
Parenting is a journey and each child is unique, amazing, and miraculous. I want to hear your stories and advice- If you have any tips you want to share or a crazy post about taming a toddler TNT please add in comments for all of us to read.
Kari,
I am sure you will get lots of wonderful advice. All I can do is smile. I smile because she is so normal and it reminds me of all the wonderful years when my kids were little and had their tantrums. Those memories goes and all the good ones stays in your heart and head. With two older ones you know you will survive – somehow. (those little cuties can trick you any time with their charm). Just thank God that she is healthy and happy. Time goes way too fast. ENJOY EVERY MOMENT, even the TNT moments 🙂
Ia
Zoie is just the cutest little thing! But I can see that spunk in her eyes. I recognize it!
My Liam Monster is 21 months and WHOA! He's stinkin' cute, funny & smart and he's also a food throwing, hitting, screaming, tantrum throwing, ear drum bursting, stubborn goatboy!
I just try to be consistent and since he's our third… I just remember how fast the toddler years go by and how I'll be missing it one day!
we got this advice from our cognitive therapist: we did "baby jail" (her crib with no toys), like a time out. AS SOON as she started whining/pitching a MAJOR Diva hissy over something totally minor, we would pick her up without looking or commenting and stick her in baby jail until she calmed down. We realized that she was using the attention/fits/loudness to keep the attention on HER (and away from the other siblings). Bad behavior would escalate until she got what she wanted :our attention. Within two weeks our house felt different, and i was not being controlled by a toddler. Hope this helps someone!
My daughter at about the same age as Zoie would do the same. I started giving her what she wanted – attention! She was overwhelmed with her developing emotions and interaction with the world and would flip out – 'oh are your frustrated' I'd say and I'd fling my arms wide open and she'd come running for a big hug out! Within seconds she was calm. Sometimes we think their wanting attention is a bad thing – if they are overwhelmed with a situation and need attention – give them some and then distract them with something they can handle!
I put my 2.5 year old in front of a mirror. I sit be hind her and tell her how silly throwing a fit looks. She has to watch herself until she is done. Then I hug her tell her how much I love her and make her say she is sorry. It is amazing how when they see what they look like it can snap them out of a fit.